Instructions 2

A secondary set of instructions needn’t mean that the first set are unfunctioning. There perhaps just needs to be an extension. This extension shall focus on the difficult task of;

Folding, in half, of a Marie Biscuit.

  1. Brew a pot of tea, the hot liquid functions as the would-be blowtorch.
  2. Add 1 sugar, go on, live a little.
  3. Hold Marie Biscuit betwixt pointing finger and thumb, gripped solidly and with purpose.
  4. Lower the biscuit in a slow and steady fashion, maintaining eye contact with the rim of the teacup. We wouldn’t want to dip the biscuit into whatever is underneath the cup.
  5. Look up and notice the little bird shaped leaf on the ground outside. Leaves are leaving trees already; it’s nearly winter again.
  6. Hold Marie biscuit in the hot tea blowtorch until half of the biscuit drops.
  7. Mutter ‘fuck’ and get another Marie biscuit.
  8. Measure the time taken for the next half of the biscuit to fall into the tea.
  9. Retrieve another biscuit and set timer for exactly one second shorter than previously recorded time.
  10. Remove newest biscuit as timer goes off.
  11. Hold removed soggy end betwixt pointing finger and thumb and pull towards dry end.

(Additional steps):

  1. Pour tea through sieve. Crumbs to be separated and devoured separately.
  2. Gulp down lukewarm liquid languorously.